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Monday, January 6, 2014

Chro: Jan 4, 2010

One should not remain incarcerated for long. But, what would you know about incarceration anyway? Doc walked in with the usual nonchalant  disgraceful look on his face, the same look he has after every vacation. I tried not to make eyecontact. He must have seen through me, I guess, so he asked....

D: What's up with you today? Hope you're not wincing in pain or something.

Nope. Some sedatives you gave me, thanks! (a****hole, if I may add)

D: Then why the faraway look? And tell me...why exactly why did you refuse to take medication, while I was off on vacation?

(Medication, vacation, nice rhyhme) Nothing Doc. (Think fast, Think fast) I'm not a good finisher, that's all. It's been always the case.

D: Yeah? That's a new one.

Yeah, a new one for you, not for me. When I was in young, I would do close to the impossible, and when people were in awe, I would drop the ball (or baton or whatever) in the final lap.

D: Ouch, I don't see how that helped.

It did not, it did naught, Mark! And later on in my life, when I thought I had a handle on things, I did some serious shit, and (surprise) it all came to nothing, in the end. This was college, mind you. But, then again, I still thought I was young and learning. I mean, how can I be so wrong. I'm not a bad (you're thinking "mad") person.

D: Hmm, go on....

Nothing worth recanting. It just kept on repeating all my life, all my freaking life. I just don't finish stuff. And it's not just the drugs you prescribed while you were on vacation.

D: Ok...so you think you were the problem, or was it the people around you, or the circumstances?

It does not matter, does it? You are around me now. Does it matter to you that I did not swallow all the pills you wanted me to chew? What if, I don't? Is it your problem? No! It's just that I don't finish well. That's all. 

D: Whatsover buddy...are you ok?

Hmmmm...Happy New Year, btw. You finished off 2009 in style!

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